Who’s heard this before? If this was properly enforced in my house when I was growing up, this was by far the most useful method my parents used to get me to shut up and get my homework done. Fast-forward a few years later, and I’m hearing my sister barking this same order to her 10 year old daughter.  But to so many  parents in this time, the question that rises is “How do we enforce this?” How can we deprive someone of something that’s practically unavoidable? In this day and age, it’s almost like saying “Don’t breathe the air until your homework is done.”

For her to truly be able to obey her order, she would either have to be in an empty room with boarded up windows, or finish her homework within the next 30 seconds. I’m sitting right in the next room, and take this dilemma a step further.

Could I, or anyone, really avoid the media?

My eyes dart back and forth to assess my situation. It’s Sunday. My Holy Day. And by that, I mean, Football Day. The TV is blaring with a clamorous cacophony of crowd chants, bruising hits, and the unbearably horrible commentary of Troy Aikman. My lap is actually sweating from the computer overheating in my lap, and my phone is right next to my hand, primed and ready for texting my friends all the trash talk I need to spout for the day.

I just watched THIS play, and I’m talking about wanting to avoid the media?

I couldn’t even finish the aforementioned question in my head without three types of media interrupting my thought process. How was this going to work?

I needed to use my computer to do homework, so I couldn’t completely avoid using that. I didn’t really have to watch television, so that was a possibility. My family is amidst a bit of an emergency situation, so my phone had to stay on. But what to make of all the signs, billboards, music, and headlines that seem to inevitably find everyone?

Knowing that most of this would be impossible, I sought out to control as much as I could. I normally wake up to the sounds of 89.7 WTMD. The first morning of my media boycott, I woke up to the monotonous buzz of an ancient alarm clock. My eyes were fixated on the road more than usual during my morning commute, in an attempt to block out all the billboards and campaign signs(By the way, avoiding the media in an election year is not the easiest task). Also, how boring would you think driving without the radio is? Well, the answer is, EXTREMELY. I can answer that question on non-hypothetical terms now. Don’t take your car-radio for granted, people.

The afternoon and evening did not provide any easier situations. Walking to and from classes on a college campus with music blaring and bulletin boards around every corner are not prime conditions to avoid the media. I couldn’t even look at the ground without seeing an advertisement in chalk screaming “COME SEE FOOLS AND HORSES CD RELEASE SHOW AT THE RECHER THEATRE 10/1,” or something like that. Hmm, maybe I will go and see that. I’m not really a fan of them, but my friends band is opening that show, and…

..And now, I’m feeling extremely defeated. Not only is it almost impossible to live a normal day without being subjected to the media, but it’s also very difficult without being sucked in entirely.

Shaking my head, I walk to my car. It’s time for work. At a sports bar. Well…maybe I won’t look at the TV’s at all today.